Morning has broken and all I can think this New Year day 2014 is how grateful I am for the gift of a day so filled with possibility. I didn't plan on writing anything this morning but upon looking out my living room window to the south, seeing how still and frozen everything is, how deeply the snow blankets all, and how the sun's bright gaze glimmers ten thousand sparkling diamonds all over the front lawn, I had to sit in the quiet of my own heart and let it all sink in.
Having lived forty years on this Earth now, I have both caused and experienced my fair share of hurt and pain and although it has taken considerable time and reflection to be able to recognize the role I myself have played as injured and injurious one, I can see how easily we all fall into the trap of the blame game. I desperately want to raise our children in an environment of hope and joyful possibility, but know too well the perils of viewing the world from a perspective of dualism, and the hurt inevitable in blaming others for our pain.
Mindfulness meditation is what my husband and I come back to time and again as a powerful way to remind ourselves to tread the middle way. Last eve, after cancelling our much anticipated New Year's Eve fete due to my contracting an infection which required treatment, I was feeling weak from the medication, ill and very disappointed, not to mention badly for all of those family and friends whose NYE plans hinged on our party. In a not very wise move I lashed out at someone I love, unjustly questioning their motives and viewing their actions as a vie for control. Ugly yes, and unfortunately true. The beauty of the middle way is that as soon as we stray off the path into a need to control outcomes, or into the belief that our notions of how things should be are more valid than another's, we can, without a moments hesitation, return to following our breath to a non-judgmental awareness of what thoughts and physical sensations we are experiencing at that very moment.
When I took some deep breaths and acknowledged my own response to the already unfortunate circumstances we were experiencing, my husband gently reminded me of my very favourite Rumi poem which was most helpful.
Out Beyond Ideas
Out beyond ideas
of wrongdoing and rightdoing,
there is a field.
I'll meet you there.
When the soul lies down
in that grass,
the world is too full to talk about.
Ideas, language
- even the phrase "each other" -
do not make any sense.
there is a field.
I'll meet you there.
When the soul lies down
in that grass,
the world is too full to talk about.
Ideas, language
- even the phrase "each other" -
do not make any sense.
mevlana jelaluddin rumi - 13th century
The Zen Buddhists call this the practice of beginner's mind and Jesus Christ himself was known for reminding his disciples to see the world as little children. There is great wisdom in the advice of these sages.
Think of someone you know whom you consider jaded. Perhaps it is a loved one, a co-worker, maybe even yourself. The general attitude of someone who is jaded is the exact opposite of the attitude of someone practicing beginners mind. A jaded person feels that they can predict outcomes based on past experiences and they carry the expectation of negative outcomes as a feature of the jaded personality. Perhaps this person has had negative outcomes to deal with in the past, but developing the habit of projecting negative outcomes onto the blank canvas of the future or present moments only serves to foster an attitude which becomes self fulfilling in which the jaded person trains themselves to look for the worst in any given situation. This can also be said for those troubled by an anxious heart. They cast a fearful outlook which is unable to trust in the possible goodness which might spring forth from new circumstances.
“Be humble: “In the beginner’s mind there are many possibilities, but in the expert’s mind there are few.”
― Shunryu Suzuki
The beginning of the new year carries much potential for personal growth and change for each of us. Many people consider making new year resolutions. What if our resolution was to try and walk into each moment of our lives as little children with beginners mind; as though it were a blank canvas, an expansive shoreline unmarred by footprints or as I gazed out upon this frigid morning, a pristine blanket of white snow? I truly think the possibilities for welcoming a childlike sense of love and wonder into our hearts are endless and that the healing power latent in such love and wonder would cure much of what ails the modern world. Imagine the possibilities!
Happy New Year 2014
Love Jill
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